Valentine’s Day: The ‘bleugh’ vs. ‘squee’ dichotomy
Being a woman is hard. The men in our lives might think they’ve experienced the worst that ladyhood has to offer, but they’re usually mistaken. It often happens that we know we’re acting completely irrationally – but we also know that we feel the way that we do because that’s how we feel. Confused? Me too.
I was forced to face this head-on on the all-too-recent passing of the yearly holiday celebrating cupid, fluffy toys and consumerism. You can probably already tell that I think Valentine’s Day is stupid. So does my boyfriend. So why did I get so upset when Valentine’s morning came and went without a so much as a card?
You might think you’re safe from the same fate after safely circumnavigating that particular day – but what about other seemingly innocuous occasions just waiting to be ignored by your significant other? Say, your six-month anniversary. You could find yourself in a situation much like my own that day: mooching sulkily around our apartment, feeling angry despite myself.
All that time, the same question was swimming around my admittedly jumbled mind: do I really have any right to be upset about this? After all, upon considering the situation, it was obvious that I’d misplaced my expectations. Time for a reality check. Yes, I had given my boyfriend a gift, thanks to my sappy side overtaking my logical feelings about the day. But expecting him to take the day seriously just because I did in a moment of silly giggliness seems a bit unfair. It’s not that I’d wanted a gigantic bouquet of red roses freshly plucked from a dewy field in Paris (although that would have been pretty amazing – and crazy). Simply put, I’d just wanted some show of romance despite the fact that scheduling it on a particular day each year kind of diminishes the whole concept of romance. Go figure.
The reality of the situation is this: my boyfriend is an absurdly busy medical student, and he forgot. Even after coming to this conclusion, I felt like I wanted some kind of reparation from his side – again, illogically. I spent some time wondering how on earth one could go into an argument knowing that they were on the wrong end of it, because inevitably, this is what would have happened had said boyfriend come home empty-handed.
Thankfully, this was not the case. He walked in with nothing at first, and my heart sank, but a few minutes later he was in front of me with his hands behind his back, a slight smile on his face. He held out a beautifully packaged red velvet cupcake (my favourite) and then a single red rose. I was delighted – mainly because this eliminated the need for all that mental grappling with myself.
Have any you ever been in a situation like this? Did you luck out on a happy ending like I did or not so much? Go on, share your not-so-special special occasions horror story in the comments below.