Wedding catering is a business all about presentation, taste and flair, so please spare a moment for the caterer that got told – ‘we want cabbage on our menu and lots of it’. Don’t get me wrong here – nothing wrong with cabbage, but serving it as part of a delicate menu at a wedding proved to be a complicated task. Oh and then there was the little incident as well.

Our story starts twenty six years ago when our groom was born. At that stage the cabbage patch doll craze was long forgotten, but his mum kept a huge cabbage made from felt. These cabbages were the packaging in which you would get your new doll.  His very first baby pictures taken of him was sleeping inside his own oversized cabbage. From that day on his affair with cabbage grew and he even got the nickname to proof it. Patch grew up to be a strong and healthy lad that ate like a monster. His favourite food – well of course it was cabbage.

So when Patch met Laura, she simply had to adore his baby pictures and so the love connection was formed that lead to their summer wedding. There were no doubts that the food the caterer suggested was top shelve, but the couple put in a special request for cabbage. The caterer smiled, agreed and cussed secretly all the way back to her office. How on earth do you bring such a foul thing onto a fine dining wedding menu? She felt like dropping the wedding, but persisted.

A cabbage dish was chosen and the wedding menu was back on track. Our caterer had a negativity towards the cabbage dish that simply would not go away. On the day of the wedding, she put preparing this dish off till last. The venue had its own kitchen right next to the beautifully decorated reception area. By three o’clock the pot with cabbage was dancing on the fire and within minutes flies of all species filled the room in search of the foul smell.

This sent everyone into a frenzy – ‘get that smelly stuff out of here’ the caterer ordered. Her new apprentice dumped the cabbage in a bin right outside the door. This drove the caterer to explosive action and she kicked the bin over in a spat of cabbage rage! The cabbage juices ran into the venue and found its way into the cracks of the wooden dance floor where it stayed. No wash, no chemical no quick fix could get rid of that smell. This wedding was going to smell of cabbage.

Flies had a ball of a time and buzzed away with pure joy at their own wedding feast. Guests had a terrible time trying to ignore the foul smell. Patch and Laura had a great time telling everybody about how they are not going to pay the explosive caterer that did not serve cabbage as requested. And the caterer – she spent the evening catching up with herself over a bottle of whiskey.

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