When bridal parties turn ugly: 3 typical bridesmaids’ quarrels and how to avoid them
Getting married can sometimes feel like being a mediator. Take that group of mature, sophisticated women you’ve chosen to be your bridesmaids. If all goes according to plan, they will organize their dresses without fuss, smile in the photos and chat amiably to one another throughout the night of your wedding.
But that’s only if things go according to plan. For argument’s sake, let’s just say that your chosen bridesmaids have issues: issues with their dresses, issues each other and sometimes, just plain issues. We’re talking bridesmaids and when they become bitchy. If you don’t want to have a troupe of bridesmaids who are sullen and angry, who clearly don’t even want to be there, drop everything and finish this article now so you can learn how to avoid similar things happening to you. To make things super-duper clear, we have broken down 3 of the most typical complaints bridesmaids will have and how to rectify them without drama or tears.
The dress dilemma
Probably the most typical of all the bridesmaids’ dilemmas is the quandary over the chosen bridesmaid dresses. One of the biggest problems can arise if you, as the bride, have chosen one uniform dress for each of your bridesmaids to wear. Your bridesmaid party will consist of a small group of very different women, which means you’ll also be dealing with a variety of different body shapes. And we all know that a dress that looks fantastic on one person can look like a sack of misplaced fabric on another. If one of your bridesmaids complains about the dress not suiting her, instead of getting all military and dominant in a but-the-dresses-must-all-be-the-same way, listen to her concerns and try to find a compromise that suits both of you. A good idea is to meet somewhere in the middle. For example, agreeing for the bridesmaid to wear the same dress but to alter it in some small ways to make her feel more comfortable in it. Even worse than a self-conscious bridesmaid is one who refuses to smile on your big day, so it’s always a good idea to make sure your bridesmaids are happy with their dresses before your wedding day.
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The not-getting-along dilemma
Being a bridesmaid should not be something someone is forced into. All your bridesmaids should be in it because they want to be. They should be excited about their role in your upcoming wedding, not dreading it. That being said, when deciding on which friends and family will be part of the bridal party, make sure they are as pumped about their role as you are. If they are only doing it to please or placate you, you might find that later on you will encounter problems with them. Another thing to consider is how the group of bridesmaids will mesh as a group. When bridesmaids are uncomfortable with each other or do not get along, it shows. This is not to say that all your bridesmaids have to be buddy-buddy; they don’t. They just all have to want to be there and be open and friendly towards each other. When bridesmaids don’t get along with each other things can get out of control fast. The last thing you want is cat fights at your own wedding, so make sure that all your bridesmaids are enjoying themselves and you won’t have anything ugly to deal with on the big day.
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The cost dilemma
Being a bridesmaid can turn into a costly experience, what with purchasing the dress, shoes, jewelry and paying for their hair and makeup on the day. To ensure your bridesmaids are ok with all the expenses, be as considerate as you can and try to make things easier for them in the penny department. Some good ideas include sourcing reasonably priced bridesmaids dresses (preferably ones they could wear again for special occasions), offering to pay for their hair and makeup and gifting each bridesmaid with a small piece of jewelry on the day of the wedding. Adding these small touches will ensure your bridesmaids feel unique and special, and will also help them feel excited about being a bridesmaid.
On the day of your wedding, make sure to pay lots of attention to your bridesmaids and to let them know how valued they are. Your wedding is a special time for you, but it is also a special time for your bridesmaids, who get to share it with you. So include them in as many of the photos as you can and appreciate them for who they are – an elite group of your closest friends and family, chosen by you.
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